Just Say Yes

What is something you are scared of? Not having enough money? Time? Being afraid of sharks? Spiders? Heights? I’m personally terrified of spending my time incorrectly or wasting it.

We all have fears. They are what hold us back from our goals. The fear of failure or the fear of embarrassment. It is a lot easier to say no to something unfamiliar, unique or unusual then to figure out the details and maybe put yourself in an uncomfortable situation.

If you are an introvert and have a low social battery, saying yes is hard. Being in your own space, curled up in bed, reading, cooking, etc, is something that you would rather do then out and about in an unknown place, doing unknown things.

Their is a problem with constantly saying no, sticking to routine and not getting outside you comfort zone. You begin to settle. You settle with your boring job, mundane friendships and maybe a toxic relationship. You face the fact that it’s just the way life is and you settle for the rat race, chasing the dollar lifestyle. Mad at the government for taxes, traffic laws and not fixing potholes. You may drink or smoke to much but you surround yourself with others who do the same, which makes you feel better about yourself. Or maybe you are a student studying something your parents want you to be, or something you were passionate about when you were 18 but now you change your mind. But hey, that’s life and you have bills you need to pay so you can’t just drop everything and book a one way ticket to a little island somewhere.

I think what goes hand and hand with saying yes is trying something new, without the fear of failure. In the MLB the guy who got the most home runs also had the most strikeouts. Which means he was failing so much he began winning. If he never tried to hit the ball with all his power, it would have never gone over the walls. Try something new… What’s the worst that’ll happen?

In my life yes is my favourite word. First with modelling giving it everything I had. I ended up ‘failing’ but I learned so much from that experience. At the end of the day with all that knowledge I have on networking, the entertainment industry and selling myself, did I fail? Or did I win?

Many people weigh out the pros and cons. Normally allowing the cons to take over. The problem with this is their are always cons like investing money into experience, taking time you may not have with your employer or my favourite con is kidnapping/ being killed. The pros however are typically (but not always) trying something outside your comfort zone, pushing yourself mentally or physically and the reward of mental satisfaction.  People are lazy and they choose to allow the ‘fear’ of cons to hold them back.

The word realistic pops up a lot. Do you think if Steve Jobs, Beyoncé, Donald Trump, Lexie Alford, etc we’re realistic we would know there names? Thinking unrealistic, outside the box, doing things that scare the absolute shit out of you and trying new things, is what is going to make your life filled with enjoyment. Being the cool old person that says ‘back in my day’ were the people who took risks and said yes.

North America is bad for saying yes right away to making plans but never following through. I am guilty of agreeing to something but letting it slip through the cracks a week later. Everything sounds like a good idea in theory but when it comes down to it, people pull out. Making excuses and apologizing afterwards is all to common. Why do we do it? I am working on making my yes’s more intentional.

This is where we refocus back onto my life and experiences. Sure saying yes constantly isn’t the best. It can put you in icky situations, however it is rare. Having common sense is a good trait. If someone offers you drugs of any kind, a sketchy car offers you a ride, a date doesn’t feel right, it is okay to say no. Follow your gut feeling even though not everyone is out to kill, rape or steal you, most people have good intentions.

I said yes to hitchhiking with a random family in the ‘most dangerous country in the world’ El Salvador. It was amazing, broke away so many stereotypes I had about the country and I drove in a truck that was double my age.

I said yes to skinny dipping in Cambodia after a boat party. The water was calm and warm plus when you moved you feet under the water the plankton lit up into blue dots. Making them stars in the sea. An incredible experience.

I said yes to a waiter in Bosnia when he offered to take me on a date. We spoke different languages but it turned out fantastic. Even though their was no chemistry between us he still ended up taking me to local spots and sharing his culture and family experiences with me. Something you cannot pay for on a tour.

I’ve been saying yes around the world for a couple years now. I’ve had maybe a hundred good examples of saying yes out of those hundred I’ve possibly had two or three bad experiences but even then I ended up learning something each time.

I am again in Spain. My third time. I am in theory supposed to be in Morocco however I said yes to travelling in a van with four other people. Now I am here having an amazing time. Trying something new, experiencing a culture with others my age and creating new memories. Sure it’s uncomfortable to be five people, who were strangers two weeks ago in very small space but that makes it all the more interesting and pushes people even further. Although we are having a lot of fun and the laughs never end.

Okay dudes, try something new for me. Use this as fuel. Even if it’s something small like painting the sunset. Anything is possible. Get out of your own head. Ciao babes. (If you need more inspiration check out Yes Theory on YouTube)

xxx

All photos taken by Matt.