Travel Romance Gone Wrong
Malaysia, 2020
My favourite place in the world is Phu Quoc. It is an island in Vietnam. It has a special place in my heart for a handful of reasons but ultimately it is the place where I reached clarity and realized I was going to be okay. I had met a group of amazing people, one of them being this German girl Luca. We were the same age and both travelled solo. It was my 19th birthday the night before and everyone at my hostel went to the beach, we had a fun night of drinking around the campfire, singing songs and skinny dipping. It was very memorable.
The morning came around and I was feeling sad. I did not want to be 19 and I felt so lost. When I finally left the room Luca was waiting with a ‘cake’ made out of fruits with some large candles. It was the nicest thing anyone had done for me in months. I cried. That night there was a half-moon party at a bar. Luca and I had gone out for a couple of drinks but didn’t want to go too crazy. We hit the dance floor and I had locked eyes with a tall, brown-eyed, handsome gentleman named Matthew. He had a beautiful accent and we hit it off right away. Luca was getting a bit tired so I called her a cab and sent her back to the hostel where we were staying. I went back to the party and continued dancing with Matthew.
My birthday cake from Luca
Soon enough we took a break from the dance floor and a magnet brought our lips together. I honestly hate kissing in public but that night I did not care. After a couple of hours, he suggested that we go back to his place. I was living life on edge and it was still technically my birthday, so of course, I said yes. When we got to his hostel he asked the reception if there was a private room. Unfortunately, there was not. Matthew had this crazy idea to go to the beach on his scooter. Although I do not condemn drunk driving or driving drunk there are a handful of times I get in the car with someone who has been drinking. It’s not anything I brag about but I always say I have done worse in worse countries.
We made it to this gorgeous beach outside a huge resort. At this time it is 3 am. We both strip down to our underwear to go skinny dipping. We throw our clothes on a beach chair and run in the water. The cool thing with South East Asia is that the plankton in the water glows under the moonlight. We were embracing each other like the scene in the notebook. After about 10 minutes we see a flashlight shining in the water next to us. We sprint out of the water mostly naked and I hide under a beach chair while he hides behind a sun umbrella. When the guards flashlight turned off we grabbed our clothes and booked it back to the scooter.
Matthew ended up driving me to where I was staying. We chilled for a little bit and talked more than we had all night. We figured out we were both going to Ho Chi Minh the next day but on different flights. We made plans to meet in the city the following night, kissed goodbye, then went to bed.
The next day I said goodbye to Luca who I felt at the time was my soulmate. However, I was looking forward to seeing Matthew. I checked into my hostel a couple of hours before he arrived. We were staying in different places. I had met a nice group of people and they had invited me to a sunset bar. Of course, I said yes. It was originally going to be one beer but you guys know how that works. After maybe 4 or 5 we were all feeling rowdy and wanted to go out. We grabbed dinner in some dodgy alley and at this point, I texted Matthew to meet the group on a specific street. Vietnam has an insane nightlife and honestly, the odds of meeting on the street I suggested and finding each other without SIM cards in our phone were so low. However, I remember him just kind of appearing.
We got some beer from a corner store so Matthew could catch up to how drunk we were before we hit the clubs. The group of people were so fun and we went to this one club and each ordered a drink. They also had balloons which is some type of gas that makes you high and you suck on the balloon. Kind of like a head rush. Balloons scare me so I pass on the opportunity but Matthew gets one and as he is sucking on the balloon he passes out or faints. A reminder to not do those things, lol.
We then went to another bar with a hookah. I do not mind doing a hookah once and a while because it has been around for so long. I forget exactly how it happened but somehow I was going back to Mathews. I had a lot of beers by this point and I low key was blackout. When I blackout I am not crazy, I just don’t always remember what happened the night before. We spent the night together and it was worth the wait. I woke up in early in the morning because I had to check out of where I was staying. I was going to Hanoi later in the day. I left his hotel and got a GRAB which is uber but on motorbikes. I then head to the airport and to catch my flight.
Out of coincidence, Matthew was also going to Hanoi. We were also sleeping in the same place and he had gotten a private room. Before we met up in Hanoi he went to a tattoo shop and told me to meet him there. When I entered he would not even look at me so I left. That night he apologized and said since he was getting a tattoo on the upper thigh he couldn’t look at me without getting hard. I thought this was funny and oddly romantic. We had given up on travelling solo and decided we should just say fuck it and travel together. We booked 3 days, 2-night hike through Sapa which is the rice field part of Vietnam.
Sapa, Vietnam // 2020
I won’t go into too much detail but we had an amazing time. The weather was a bit rainy and it made things interesting. Slipping and sliding while seeing the most gorgeous sights. Some little Vietnamese girls would hold your hand so you wouldn’t fall. We stayed in a homestay which is one of the scariest places I have ever stayed. It was just a single light bulb hanging from the ceiling and a room filled with beds.
When we arrived back from Sapa to Hanoi we had one day together before Matthew was going back to Austria and I was going to Thailand. We utilized this day to see all the local sights. At night we had some cheap beers before we went back to the hotel early to spend one last night together. In the morning Matthew left very early and did not say a long goodbye. He explained it was because he did not want to be sad but I am not a morning person so this worked out okay for me. I later left for Thailand.
I liked Matthew. He was 25-years-old, intelligent, good-looking and also was into me. I had not had feelings that strong for anyone in my life. It was the perfect time as well because I was starting to think there was something wrong with me and he restored some of my confidence. We texted back and forth a little bit over the years but it was more just reliving the memories we had created together.
In the summer of 2021 I was in Austria. Not specifically to see Matthew but it was for sure in the back of my mind. I understand people are busy especially when they are trying to hustle. I also have had 2-3 jobs while studying so I am very understanding when someone cannot make a lot of time. I had only given Matthew a two-day warning that I was coming. I was very excited when he said that he would meet me for dinner and afterwards go to the club with his friends. I went to Zara (a clothing store) and bought a stunning outfit. I texted him at 6 pm then again an hour later. I was getting hungry so I went to dinner alone and I was hoping he would text me later with what club he was going to so I could meet him there. He never texted that night. I was disappointed, to say the least. The guy that had at one point restored my faith in men had also taken it away just as easily.
I did get a reason why he never showed up. He said he tried acid for the first time. What a real winner. Men fucking suck. Just like that, I started my journey back home to Canada. That is where my adventure with the first guy I ever really liked ends.
Sometimes you idealize someone because that is what you think you want. When I was in Austria I was a different person than the girl I was in Vietnam. In Austria, I was confident, calm and I realized almost immediately that it was his loss. I now know my worth as a person and if someone wants to do drugs instead of hanging out with me I probably don’t want them in my life anyway.
Another day another post. I hope you guys are liking these stories. I enjoy writing them and sharing the adventures with the world. My next story will be up on Sunday about the time I was drugged in Thailand. xx
Sapa, Vietnam // 2020